1979 / 136 Minutes / PG
Reviewed by Dale J. Nauertz

For years my path to attaining true geekhood has been blocked by only one thing: I just can’t get into “Star Trek”. I’m not sure why it is, but I’ve watched several episodes of the show and while I find it captivating at times, I’m mostly just staring at the television in boredom, wondering how some people can find so much joy in something I find so hokey and lame. I mean, I like sci-fi. And I certainly admire the antics of William Shatner. But with a few exceptions (the half of the “Tribbles” episode I’ve seen, “Star Trek: First Contact”) I remain unimpressed. It is said that you are either a “Star Wars” person or a “Trek” person. Perhaps that explains it. I’ve always, ALWAYS loved “Star Wars”. My earliest pop culture memories involve begging my parents or grandparents for “Star Wars” action figures (according to my father, I once lost Chewbacca and was inconsolable until they stopped everything, made a trip to the store, and purchased a new one). If it’s an “either/or” thing, then I made my decision about seventeen years ago and “Star Trek” never stood a chance.

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2009 / 163 Minutes / R
Reviewed by Dale J. Nauertz

Every decade has its genre du jour. In the 30’s, it was the gangster picture. In the 50’s, it was the biblical epic. In the 80’s, it was “weird shit happening in suburbia” movies (which includes not only “E.T.”, “Back to the Future” and “Gremlins” but also David Lynch’s “Blue Velvet”). Our decade, of course, has the comic book adaptation. At its worst, this genre has given us every two-bit superhero imaginable in a pandering, kid-friendly PG-13 package (”Ghost Rider”, I suppose, is as good an example as any, though I thought it was a lot of fun). With such films as “Sin City”, “The Dark Knight” and now “Watchmen”, however, the genre has finally grown up.

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2008 / 87 Minutes / PG-13
Reviewed by Dale Nauertz

One of the reasons I began writing movie reviews in the first place was so that I could warn others whenever I had the misfortune to watch something particularly awful, much like Ralph Nader used to warn people about unsafe automobiles (like the Chevy Corvair). Like Ralph I was hoping to use my cinematic watchdog skills to eventually, and ineffectually, campaign for president. Unfortunately, it seems that I have failed you, dear viewers. I don’t deserve to run even as a third party longshot for president. If I can’t warn you about the dangers of watching Mike Myers’ “The Love Guru”, how can I be expected to serve you in any other way?

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2008 / 99 Minutes / R
Reviewed by Dale J. Nauertz

Before he co-starred in the movie “Anchorman”, I thought of Paul Rudd as just another generic Hollywood pretty boy predetermined to be the Next Big Thing. This was based on his fine, but forgettable, performances in movies like “The Cider House Rules” and “Romeo + Juliet” (=Death). But since then, Paul Rudd has grown into one of the most consistently hilarious men in modern cinematic comedy. He’s got a sarcastic, low key bordering on deadpan way of delivering a line and wringing the maximum hilarity out of it. Not only that, but he’s got dashing, leading man good looks and charisma to spare. He’s generally one of the best things about any movie he’s in, so I’ve been scratching my head for the past couple of years wondering why this guy hasn’t starred in his own movie, why this guy isn’t on the fast track to become the next Tom Hanks? Thankfully, I need wonder no more because Paul is finally front and center in “Role Models”, a delightfully raunchy (and decidedly R-rated) film that takes the standard, inspirational adult-mentoring-kids-and-learning-something-themselves movie and administers a swift kick to its nuts.

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2008 / 107 Minutes / R
Reviewed by Dale J. Nauertz

I tend to like movies about making movies but I think, in general, that people who aren’t really, really into movies tend to find such movies very, very boring. (I tried to make my own wife watch “Ed Wood”, for example, and she thought it was utterly pointless. She demanded I turn it off about halfway through. I must really love this woman, seeing as how I didn’t automatically file for divorce.) Therefore, I think it’s very clever that Ben Stiller took a movie about making a movie (inherently box office poison) and filled it with big stars, delightfully vulgar humor and plenty of things blowing up real pretty. Even if you find movies about making movies as boring as I find most “inspirational” sports movies (ugh!) you’ll probably laugh your ass off during the majority of “Tropic Thunder”.

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2008 / 150 Minutes / PG-13
Reviewed by Dale J. Nauertz

For the past few years, every summer gives me the opportunity to bitch about how shitty its crop of blockbusters has been…until now. Aside from “Indy 4″ (which wasn’t very good) this has been one of the best summer movie seasons in recent memory. “Wall E” was clever, inspired and heartwarming with a dash of pointed social satire and a unique style (miles above the standard kids movie dreck but par for the course coming from Pixar). “Iron Man” was the most fun a person can have at the movies, with great performances, wonderful character development, and nifty action sequences. Heck, “Get Smart” was downright ingenious considering it was an adaptation of a musty, old TV show. But even so, Christopher Nolan’s “The Dark Knight” stands head and shoulders above this distinguished company. It is one of the meatiest, most thought-provoking, most flat-out stunning films that any summer has unleashed. In fact, after two viewings, I am tempted to proclaim it the best comic book movie ever made. It is so good, in fact, that calling it a mere “comic book movie” hardly does it justice.

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2008 / 110 Minutes / PG-13
Reviewed by Dale J. Nauertz

Guillermo Del Toro is a likable enough guy. But, as a director, he seems to return to the same well over and over again. Allow me to elaborate.

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2008 / 136 Minutes / PG-13
Reviewed by Dale J. Nauertz

There are some movies that don’t truly suck, but they fall so short of how good they could have been that you say they suck anyway, even though they’re really just kinda mediocre. The fourth entry in the “Indiana Jones” franchise is just such a movie. It’s not exactly horrible, and it has some entertaining moments here and there, but it sucks because it should have been so much better.

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2008 / 136 Minutes / PG-13
Reviewed by Dale J. Nauertz

Bruce Wayne is a pussy.

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2008 / 112 Minutes / R
Reviewed by Dale J. Nauertz

I may not love Judd Apatow as much as a lot of people but I’ve got to admire his pretty much single-handed revitalization of the modern comedy. His “40 Year Old Virgin” is an inspired bit of art, a movie with heart and soul that manages to keep its romantic comedy leanings fresh and provocative…and its raunchy moments are truly ingenious. “Knocked Up” mined the same formula and stumbled a bit, though it was overall pretty good (it lacks “40 Year Old”’s replay value, however). Apatow and his collaborators (especially the underrated Jake Kasdan who made one of my favorite films of the 90’s with “The Zero Effect” before taking a completely different career track with “Orange County”) then bounced back with “Walk Hard”, a rather inspired parody of the musical biopic genre (scenes like the destruction of the sink were simply dead-on). I didn’t see “Superbad”, mostly because the teenagers-trying-to-score genre is beyond played out for me, but I hear mostly good things. Aside from “Virgin”, each of these movies arrived in theaters bearing the Apatow seal of approval within just one year. Even with some quibbles about their quality (though none of the ones I have seen are less than three fist efforts) I have to admit this is an extraordinary feat for one group of talented people: Apatow, Seth Rogen, Bill Hader and Jonah Hill.

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